I’m the first to admit that I <3 Threadless. A quick estimate would indicate I have at least ten T-shirts from them, and I always want more. However, I recently bought a new one, and have discovered a problem.

I always knew that there were problems with buying the ‘girly’ version of a Threadless tee. For one, they’re made by sickening progressive-poseur brand American Apparel. (link is to an article touching on AA’s union-busting, exploitative advertising, sexually harassing work-environment, et cetera—PDF) For another thing, because AA is so devoted to their skinny nymphette images, the largest size of ‘girly’ tee Threadless can offer is extra-large, and that extra-large is smaller than a Gap large. I’m seriously considering ripping the sleeves off some of these suckers so I can expand the arm hole. Anyway, all that was known. But such is my <3 of Threadless that, when the populace has consumed all the medium ‘Guy’ shirts on offer, I occasionally pop for the XL ‘Girly’.

Well, I may have to recalculate. I bought this shirt recently:

Perhaps the picture is a bit small, but take a look. Click through if you like. Now, imagine the helpful model picture isn’t there. How long would it take you to understand the conceit of the design?

And how long would you be comfortable staring at that design to figure it out when it’s stretched over my non-nymphette frame on a protesting background of nymphette-friendly American Apparel cotton?

Exactly. No one gets the shirt because they don’t want to stare at my bosom that long. This constitutes a huge flaw in the Threadless girly tee system.