Yes, it’s drawing near, that time of year,
when the “ho” of Santa Claus we hear.
Bishops and kings arrive from far east;
bucolic staff in the hand of each.
Ten megawatt lightshows and a whirring of servos,
make bloodpressures rise and my piggy bank nervous!

:)

Comes September again at old Jimville High Apostolic;
the coach, Old Leatherlungs, waxes alcoholic.
Vlad Quarterback’s quarter bag carries the chronic
while linebackers line up for steroids anabolic.
Old Leatherlungs goads them in rhetoric vitrolic;
he’ll send them in practice ‘gainst creatures bucolic.
The fullbacks will stagger off, feeling amphibolic,
reaching for Vicodin, anodyne and antimelancholic.
At the first game, though, when cheerleaders frolic,
their hearts will wax noble, their groins hypergolic.
Their passes will fly out in arcs parabolic!
They’ll bring low all oncomers, rural and metropolic.
And after each game come revels ethanolic;
the townies will come to moonlight pharmacopolic.
Vlad sends cheerleaders running for remedies ambolic.
Years later, he’ll have naught but tales hyperbolic.

My sister, she has a pet monkey
I think he might be alcoholic
He wears a straw hat,
Throws poop at the cat,
And moos in a manner bucolic

Pending determination of the word “ambolic” (dictionary.com avails me not), you have taught me a new word in my Favorite Words feature! You get a gold star or somethin’. (new word: hypergolic)

In all seriousness, I thought that was a dog! And it makes a sort of horrible yapping, like a soul being flogged with a wet noodle in Heck…

Something ambolic is something that can induce abortion. And no comment on my brilliant and insightful verse? [snicker]

Stupid dictionary.com!

Snicker is my comment on your brilliant verse!

East/each? Well, it was fairly early in the day…

Close enough for government work, and probably close enough to sing (the true test of a weak rhyme).