Hi, my name is Felicity, and I’m addicted to shoes.
Hi, Felicity…
If I were really seeking therapy, I would tell you about my Grandmother, about how she had, before her aging feet and pragmatism protested, about two and a half closets full of shoes. I would tell you about her collection of glass and porcelain shoe knick-knacks, I would tell you about getting hand-me-down dress shoes as a child and the sweaty torment of half-price moon boots. But I am not seeking therapy. That would mean I wanted to STOP.
I love shoes. They’re transformative, in a way only shoes or a hat can be. They change you, not only how you look, but how you walk, and the level from which you see the world. Frivolous shoes let the world know you’re out for fun. Whimsical shoes to let the Man know he hasn’t got you down yet. Heavy stomper boots to let the chem exam know you take no prisoners. No one thinks you’re weird for wearing the same shoes a week in a row. You don’t have to wash them, just brush them when they get dirty and tuck them in at night.
All of this is only a flailing attempt to touch the true reason I love shoes—something I really don’t understand, deep down. All I know is that one pair is never enough. There is an infinity of pleasing shapes and ornaments, and I can never own enough of them. Even if I could, how could I own every shape in every color?
Comments
A note
Due to my toe, I have been wearing the same right sandal for pretty much two weeks. I am so tired of it now.
Prior to the toe, I wanted some black, heeled sandals appropriate for work. This weekend, I met them. They are on sale for 70 bucks at Nordstrom (yes, I walked around the Nordstrom shoe dept. when I can’t try on shoes. I do hate myself, yes.) They are black suede and Italian and cunning. And I cannot have them yet.
Word.
What you just said. Yeah.
I would add that it SKIPS a generation; witness our mother’s sensible SAS sneakers and SAS sandals. Yick.
Re: Word.
Either that or deep inside her there’s a shoe-demon that has been stunted because she has such unusual feet. I hesitate to call them “big”, because while they are long, they are extremely slender. They look like the kind of feet a willow-fairy would have. At any rate, Isaac Mizrahi and his ilk don’t design with willow faeryes in mind.
This I do not understand
And I’m probably not meant to understand. My entire shoe collection consists of:
1) Tennis shoes. These are worn by default.
2) Brown casual dress shoes. Because I need something to where when I’m not wearing jeans.
3) Brown dress shoes. Because I have brown dress pants.
4) Black dress shoes. Because I have a black suit.
5) Previous pair of tennis shoes (same model as my current tennis shoes, just worn out). Because sometimes you plan on getting your shoes dirty.
That just about does it. Five pairs of shoes for any occasion. Why would anyone need more???
Re: This I do not understand
Jesus God! You know what color your shoes are?
My shoe collection:
Shoes as Supports
An outfit of clothes is the symbolic self we present to the world. Our feet are our supports. We stand on them and they reliably keep us up. Thus, shoes are the symbolic support to the self we want to present to the world. When we want to assume an identity with our ritual garb, the footwear is the foundation of that identity, and while it may be overshadowed by other elements of the garb, it colors and provides support for all of it.
Re: This I do not understand
Hear, hear.
“Coupling”, arguably the best TV show to appear in the last five years, has an excellent rant durng, I think, its second season about women and shoes. One character, when faced with his girlfriend’s exploding shoe collection and, suggests that the only reason an individual would need that many pairs of shoes would be if they grew extra feet at night and walked around in them.
This I understand - kinda
I dont own a lot of shoes, if i had the money and time to shop that might be different
1)Merrell Jungle moc’s because my feet should be comfy and few things are better then these.
2)Teva Flipflops because my feet should be comfy ans sometimes its hot.
3)Hiking boots because “comfy” gets redefinde when youve just walked 7 miles over rough terrain.
3)Dressy sandals they were cheap and i needed something to wear for interviews.
4)Two pair of running shoes. I dont like wearing them unless i have to, witch isnt often
5)Evil nike flipflops that i only ever wore in the shower, at the gym.
Now, if i could i would probably get a much nicer pair of dress sandals, a nice pair of dress shoes, a pair of casual brown leather sandals and a pair of GOOD running shoes. I could go on but then i might incriminate myself ;-) oh, and new hiking boots, mine do this funny thing on the right boot where it digs slightly at the toe…...
Re: Shoes as Supports
Ladies and Gentlemen, I give you Rock Star, the brother I never had.
This you do not understand
Okay, I’m sure I’ll forget some here, and some of these are not available to me for packing reasons. We’re excluding slippers, which I don’t really care about and tend to lose.
1. Brown sandals I am wearing half of now. Bought in Walla Walla WASH with my sister, because I didn’t have any brown sandals.
2. Slip-on brown sandals. Because 1 were getting ugly (since fixed w/balsam) and 2 were soooo cute.
3. Wedge-heeled black Clark’s sandals: bought in 8th grade or so on big sale. Sole peeling, need cobbler.
4. Black leather stupid pumps. Franco Sarto. Supposed to be comfy work shoes. Instead big chunky heels slip off my feet and gash my ankles. Thinking of exchanging for diff. size.
5. Black nubuck 40’s style pumps. 4. are not pretty. These are. And it was out of birthday money from my grandma. They are sooooo cute.
6. 40’s style camel near-stilettos from Isaac Mizrahi. Because I got a free salmon-colored vintage suit and didn’t have a thing to wear with it. And because $197 shoes seem reasonable when you’re planning a wedding and completely mad.
7. Black magnolia-decoration strappy sandal kitten heel slides. Because I got a free black vintage evening gown and didn’t have a thing to wear with it.
8. Lavender-died godawfully uncomfortable heels, because I had to bridesmaid, and didn’t realize that dress shoes named after a death goddess were a bad idea.
9. Gold strappy dress sandals. Because I was going to a formal and I needed mermaid-lookin’ shoes.
10. Cream ballet-style slippers. For the bride.
11. Slightly sparkly flat Mary Janes in black
12. knee-high near-stiletto black leather boots. Because.
13. Worn-out suede ballet-style slippers—for Ren Faires.
14. Black suede Minnetonka moccasins.
15. Big brown stompy London Undergrounds. Because I love them too much to get rid of them even though the sole is cracking.
16. Light brown rather odd London Undergrounds. A cross between farmer boots and 70s running shoes. My dear London Underground was going under, and they were on sale.
17. Black Doc Martens Oxfords. Docs I can wear to work.
18. Brown suede Hush Puppy Oxfords. To wear with slacks.
19. Grey hiking boots.
20 and (probably) 21. Old hiking boots. For beach, et c.
22. Speedo flip flops. Beach, et c.
23. Blue slip-on keds. Comfy and easy.
24. Red suede Skechers tennies. Cuz they’re fun.
25. Old Reebox tennis shoes. For actual tennis.
26. Columbia waterproof boots. For the midwest.
Other shoes may be around, old Salt Water Sandals, my first pair of heels ever (white, for 8th grade Graduation), old keds…they may be in a bag my mom brought from Bend, or languishing in her basement, I don’t know. I’m probably forgetting some, as this is just off the top of my head. As I write this list, I keep thinking things like “Ooh, I need new ones of those. I need those in black. I could use a more stylish pair like that.” Does the picture begin to emerge?
Re: This you do not understand
That list really looks short to me…huh.
Re: This I do not understand
Yeah, I’m with you there.
1. Timberland hiking boots, for everyday wear and hiking. These are worn smooth on the heel and need replacing.
2. Black suede dress shoes. Sometimes you have to wear a suit.
3. Sandles. For when I need sandles.
4. Snow shoes. These are somewhere in my parents’ garage.
Re: This I do not understand
Ooooooh, your hiking boots need replacing? We need to go SHOE-shopping? poing poing
Re: This I do not understand
heh…yes, I do know what color my shoes are. I often wear “nice” clothes to work, thus requiring that I branch out slightly into appropriate shoes. But nothing excessive like coughFelicitycough, not to name names or anything…