Now that I’m 23, I know things I didn’t know before. Like if you see a news helicopter in the suburbs, take the back roads home. When you see TWO, abandon the car and run screaming, because your feet will get you to your house faster than the vehicle.

Yesterday, before 8:11 pm, I did not think of these things, and merely watched the helicopters idly, with no more interest than if they had been seagulls. Now I have seen, negotiated, circumnavigated, and cursed, the traffic jam responsible for the conjunction of whirligigs, and I am much much wiser. And older, but that applies to all traffic jams.